Divorce and Autism: Making the Best of an Unfortunate Situation

The myth that families of children with Autism have an 80% divorce rate was proven false by researcher Brian Freedman, PhD, clinical director of the Center for Autism and Related Disorders at the Kennedy Krieger Institute in Baltimore, as this article, Autism Families: High Divorce Rate Is a Myth, states. Despite the fact that parents of a child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder experience more stress, the rates of divorce remain similar to those of parents with neuro-typical children. Unfortunately, that does not mean that parents of special needs children do NOT get divorced.

So what is a parent of a child with Autism to do when they suddenly become an every other weekend dad or mom? The answer is the same I would give any other divorced parent; find a way to co-parent constructively. When couples with children divorce it becomes necessary for them to mindfully redefine their relationship. Remember that there are no ex-parents, only ex-spouses. Despite the fact that the marriage has ended the parenting connection will continue forever.

The best gift any parent can give their child in this situation is to make a conscious effort to redesign their roles, without conflict and negativity. This means:

1. Putting the needs of the children first.

2. Separating parenting issues from personal issues.

3. Establishing new boundaries.

4. Discovering a way to effectively communicate with one another.

This is much easier said than done but here are a few suggestions to keep you on track.

- Communicate regularly with your ex about the therapies your child is receiving and find out how you can reinforce them during your time together. Consistency is important for children on the spectrum and keeping schedules and routines as similar as possible between houses will help.

- Pay attention to your environment and try to look at it from your child's perspective. Taking your child's sensory sensitivities in mind try to create a space for him that will be predictable and comforting in order to make her feel secure in their other home.

- Be mindful of how your child handles the transitions when moving from house to house. Coping with a new situation takes time. Keep in mind that it will take her a while to settle in when first arriving from the home of your ex.

- Don't let guilt run the way you parent. Remain in charge. Your children need to know the boundaries and how to be responsible for themselves more than ever. Loving, positive rules create emotional order, which in turn allows character and love to grow.

- Create your own family rituals, they make great memories. This can be as simple as having regular family meals with candlelight, making bedtime a predictable routine with storytelling, or creating traditions for holidays and special events.

- Remember that love is not about externals. You don't have to be a Disneyland dad or an overindulgent mom. Spend your time, not your money, on making genuine connections that create secure relationships with your children. This will reduce the need your children may have to search for outside 'things' to feel valued and important.

- Manage your new home with the same close attention you give your job/career/ business. Remember, in this job, you are the boss and you run the household. Keep in mind how you would rate yourself on a performance evaluation.

Connie Hammer, MSW, parent educator, consultant and coach, guides parents of young children recently diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder to uncover abilities and change possibilities. Visit her website http://www.parentcoachingforautism.com/ to get your FREE resources - a parenting e-course, Parenting a Child with Autism - 3 Secrets to Thrive and a weekly parenting tip newsletter, The Spectrum.

Original article

Autism Symptoms in Infants and Children

According to health officials and medical professionals, the exact causes of the Autism disorder are still unclear although there is considerable agreement that there exists some type of genetic link between the disorder and the afflicted person's genes. There are other variables that could be possible causes such as environmental factors and immune system abnormalities. Regardless, the majority of all health and medical professionals agree that early intervention and diagnosis is still the best course of action to pursue.

Recognizing the early warning signs of the disorder

Past clinical research has demonstrated that the earlier a child is properly diagnosed and a treatment is prescribed, the outcome in the long-run will be considerably better. The following are some of the National Institute of Mental Health's early warning signs:

o In many cases, the child doesn't respond with a joyful facial expression (i.e., smile)

o The child hasn't spoken a single word by the time they are 16 months old

o They appear not to understand how they should play with their toys

o They are not babbling, making meaningful and/or noticeable, or pointing by the time they have reached 12 months of age

o They do not maintain eye contact for any length of time, if they do make it at all

o They haven't started to combine two words together by the time they reach 2 years of age

o They rarely interact with others, sometimes not at all

o They rarely respond to their names,

o They sometimes focus entirely on a single object or toy

o They start losing acquired language and social skills

o They will focus less on critical or important issues, yet they will focus on lining up certain objects or toys

The warning signs mentioned above are the primary indicators of an Autism Spectrum Disorder being present in the individual, although there are other ones to be aware of as well. What you should remember is that there will be numerous explanations for the majority of the warning signs that we have mentioned in the points above.

Early Autism warning signs or symptoms in infants

A number of different clinical studies have revealed the following warning signs and symptoms of Autism being present in infants at certain ages:

o 6 months - absence of smiling

o 9 months - failing to exchange smiles and/or sounds with other individuals

o 1 year - the inability to babble, point at or reach for different objects, or to wave at others nearby them

o 1 year, 4 months - a lack of or a total absence of vocabulary development

o 2 years - inability to create simple phrases (two words)

o Any age - the regression of communication, social, and/or speech skills

During infancy, there may be severe sensory issues to deal with during this period in the child's life including the abnormal reaction to certain sounds, tastes, and touching. Though mild autism can be handled with proper counseling and therapy, but severe autism is difficult.

For the latest videos and training information on child development as well as books and curricula on ADHD children please visit childdevelopmentmedia.com.

Original article

How to Help Children With Autism Make Transitions

Autism has been classified as a neural development disorder and developmental disability that is characterized by repetitive and restricted behavior patterns as well as impaired communication and social skills. One of the more critical aspects of the disorder that parents of children with Autism are confronted with is transitioning from activity or task to another. The autistic child has a great deal of difficulty with this as it creates anger and confusion for them which oftentimes results in them throwing some hideous tantrums.

Consider the following 6 suggestions for helping your autistic child through these transitions so that it goes as smoothly as possible:

Always plan ahead - make sure that you always have the alarm, hourglass, or timer set up in advance so there is no confusion. You should always insist on consistency whenever babysitters, family members, teachers, or therapists are watching your child. This helps the child to understand the concept better.

Children with Autism need consistency - by using the same amount of warning time and words consistently, the child will have an easier time of adjusting to and understanding the transitions from one activity to the next. The child will also transition easier once they understand exactly what you expect of them.

Employ the reward system - making the transition from the current activity to the next one is extremely difficult for children with Autism. Offer the child some sort of incentive or reward for making a smooth transition between the activities that are on the day's agenda. The reward could be as simple as a favorite activity or one of their favorite foods.

Evaluate difficult situations - if you notice that there is a certain degree of difficulty involving the transition from one activity to the next, you can avoid any major problems (e.g. temper tantrums) by first evaluating the circumstances surrounding the transition. An example of this is a child's refusal or resistance to transitioning between activities due to certain sensory issues that upset the child. Simple accommodations or adjustments can help to correct this.

Invest in a timer if you don't have one - make sure that you purchase one that your autistic child will have an easier time of understanding when they should change the activity they are engaged in. If the child is younger an hourglass or sand timer may be easier for them to comprehend whereas an older child might be able to handle a digital clock alarm.

Respect the child's need for being warned - it is extremely difficult for children with Autism to move from one activity to the next especially if they are deeply engaged in the current activity. It's going to take a considerable amount of time and all the patience you can muster to teach them how to transition between activities. If you gently warn them that a change is coming, it will make it easier for the child to make that transition.

Remember that the goal here is to not only make transitioning easier for any children with Autism but to make them understand why it is necessary as well. Things will go a lot smoother for you overall.

For the latest videos and training information on child development as well as books and curricula on Autism please visit childdevelopmentmedia.com.

Original article